May 31, 2013

Du'a of The Day

Duʿāʾ (دعاء)

Ya Allah SWT, you are As-Salam, the source of peace. From You is all peace and tranquility.

Ya Salam, there are those across this Ummah that are living in broken homes, that are in broken relationships.

Mothers that are broken with their children, spouses whose relationships is broken, friends whose relationships are broken.

Slaves of Yours whose relationships with You are broken.

Ya Allah, You are the Healer of wounds, You are the Remover of pain, You are the Giver of peace.

Heal the hearts of those whose homes & hearts are broken. Soften the hearts that have become hard with sin.

Give patience and courage to those that are mocked and suffer as they struggle to remain on Your path.

Guide the families that are far away from guidance. Heal the hearts that are hurting and take away the pain.

Oh Lord of Mankind, make every hardship a means of returning back to You.

Give us peace in our hearts so that we can face every storm with an Alhamdulillah.

Allahuma Ameen.

May 27, 2013

I Carry Your Heart with Me

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

- E.E. Cummings

May 22, 2013

Like Petal, Like Flame

The title above is taken from someone's blog, someone that I met last night. It's Ana!! 
And today's her birthday, so last night wasn't just a meetup, it's a birthday celebration in advance. ^^ 

She's an awesome person. We talked about many things, including know, like the normal girl talk. :p Most part of the conversation was about knowing and getting into each other, because it was the 1st time that we meet in person. But from the way we talked, it's like we've been known each other forever. 

You see, this is the power of blogging. You don't just follow others' blog and hope to be followed back or to get more followers, you follow the blogs because you want to know the authors and hope to be their friend. That's what we should do in life, meet new people and learn. Who knows if the blogger you've followed would become your best friend someday. Like me and Ana. ;) 

And it's really sweet to know Ana, I'm glad to have her as a friend. We're looking forward to see each other again next time. Happy birthday, Ana. ^^

May 20, 2013

Don't let Life Kick You

p.s: Well, I'm not really at where I thought I'd be, but I know that I'm still young and it's never too late to catch those dreams. And what Chris Hadfield said is really inspiring. 

May 19, 2013

Fast in My Car to Future

I've been smiling all the time since last Thursday. How couldn't I, when Ifo got me this:

Imagine my reaction. Man, it's an awesome feeling! Oh I'm really in love with this guy.

So, yeap, I'm loving this album. Paramore have grown plenty in their music and they never fail in creating monster choruses. I adore their ability to blend genres..with songs swirl with hints of R&B, country and hard rock. Here's a little review of the album tracks.

#1. Fast in My Car - this album starts with a rebellious anthem. "been through the ringer a couple times" Hayley opens, "I came out callous and cruel". The music fits the lyrics perfectly.

#2. Now - "if there's a future, we want it now". It recalls their Misery Business jam long ago, but's surely a progression on their rebel pop sound.

#3. Grow Up - this has more of a fun bounce to it than the anger like in 1st two songs. Still, some mild irritation presents.  "I'm not a little girl no more," she sings after drying her tears and realizing she's got to drop some old friends to progress as person.

#4. Daydreaming - this track's a sweet cut about building a world that matches the ones constructed in fantasies. It's not as whimsical as its subject matter, but solid nonetheless.

#5. Interlude: Moving On - this 90-second gem is a simple one, featuring acoustic strums on the guitar, while Hayley coolly kisses off an old flame. "I could be angry, but you're not worth a fight" she sings, "and besides I'm moving on".

#6. Ain't It Fun - "ain't it fun living in the real world". It asks sarcastically to a spoiled brat discovering that the world doesn't revolve around them. Some xylophone taps and choir-like bridge make it more than your average rock song.

#7. Part II - fyi, this song's the sequel to Let the Flames Begin from Riot album. "I will catch fire to let your glory and mercy shine". She's ready to sacrifice her happiness for others.

#8. Last Hope - "the salt in my wounds isn't burning any more than it used to". It's suggesting that the lack of new pain is encouraging enough to believe that brighter days are coming.

#9. Still Into You - my favorite track! This is love anthem, fit for couples that have been together for a good while through ups and downs.

#10. Anklebiters - while hip-hop community calling naysayers as haters, Paramore calls them anklebiters, folks who prey on other people's actions. "Someday you're going to be the only one that you've got," she sings to those that should rely on their own thoughts and not what anklebiters are saying.

#11. Interlude: Holiday - with an ukulele, it's a brief cut about maturing from a high school kid to an adult, then enjoying some time off. "I don't plan on coming back," she sings nonchalantly and smoothly.

#12. Proof - just as I'm nearly dozed off on previous cut, they kick back in with a rock song where she takes her man deep-sea diving, with only love acting as their safety gear.

#13. Hate to See Your Heart Break - this is one of the lone ballads in the album and almost feels like a country song. Hayley walks down memory lane and sings about how love can hurt all. "Love happens all the time, to people who aren't kind and heroes who are blind."

#14. (One of Those) Crazy Girls - here she plays the role of a girl that refuses to be broken up with, threatening to break into her ex's home so that she can "go through your closet so I can smell your skin". LOL.

#15. Interlude: I'm Not Angry Anymore - another ukulele ditty where Hayley wavers between being bitter and sweet.

#16. Be Alone - this is about how her and her other half should be alone, together, I guess. Because she sings "we could be alone and never get too lonely".

#17. Future - encouraging listeners to keep looking ahead and following their dreams. It's a proper end to the set, gentle and aggressive all at once.

May 18, 2013

When is My Time

I still remember the moment my best friend, Fiza, told me that she's been proposed 5 months ago. I was among the 1st people who know about that, and she's really happy. And this is it, today's her engagement day! ^^

Now, usually I'm only half-happy when I heard others around me getting engaged because I've been waiting for my time. Lol. But this time, it's my best friend. So I'm truly happy for her and her fiance. Other friends from our course came too and it's such a party. As usual, when someone got engaged or married, there will be compulsory questions from friends like, "so when is your turn?", and I'd be like "hahahaha..". XD
I know they're seriously asking, but how am I supposed to know? It's a long way to go and I'll surely tell the whole world when my time comes. Come on. ;)

My dear friend Fiza looked so gorgeously beautiful today. I loved her dress and makeup. I asked her how does she feel like to be someone's fiancee, and she answered, "I'm worried about thesis!". Even engaged, she's still the same old Fiza. Hehe. But I told her to forget about thesis for a day and enjoy her moment. Honestly, I can't wait for my time. :p

pretty Fiza ^^

they say sit closely to get the vibe :p

with our friends ^^

May 16, 2013

Thank You, Teacher

Dear all teachers from SK Bandar 1 Tawau, SK Pekan Papar, SMK Takis Papar, Labuan Matriculation College (LMC) and University Malaysia Sabah (UMS) that have taught me all subjects, wherever you are, and I don't know if you'd read this, I just wanna wish you guys a Happy Teacher's Day. Not to forget my friends who are doing the most honourable job as teachers and who are becoming teachers soon, Happy Teacher's Day to all of you. 

These are some of old pictures saved in my storage, pictures of unforgettable moments with my favorite teachers. 

Add Maths teacher, Mr Ban
- SMK Takis Papar, 2005-

Chemistry lecturer, Mdm Kharolrena
-LMC, 2008-

English (MUET) lecturer, Mr Mahid
-LMC, 2008-

Maths lecturer, Mr Syed
-LMC, 2008-

And I wish there were more photos with the rest, maybe I lost them somewhere in the hard disc, but never lost in my heart. Memory lasts forever. Thank you, teachers. ^^

The best teachers don't give you the answers. They just point the way and let you make your own choices, your own mistakes. That way you get all the glory. And you deserve it.
- Mr Schuester, Glee

May 15, 2013

Big, Big World

I thought I'd share part of my list of places I someday hope to visit:

Munich, Germany

Santorini, Greece

Verona, Italy

Prague, Czech Republic

New York, USA

Paris, France

I'm not sure what I'll do, but..well, I want to go places and see people. I want my mind to grow. I want to live where things happen on a big scale. - F. Scott Fitzgerald

May 11, 2013

I Loved You Enough

I loved you enough to ask where you were going,
with whom, and what time you would be home.
I loved you enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a creep.
I loved you enough to stand over you for
2 hours while you cleaned your room,
a job that should have taken 15 minutes.
I loved you enough to let you see anger,
disappointment, and tears in my eyes.
I loved you enough to let you assume the
responsibility for your actions even when the
penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.
But most of all, I loved you enough to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.

I found the poem somewhere on tumblr. And someday I might give it to my future children. Because I want them to love me the way I love my mum. 

my lovely mum

Once upon a time, mum insisted on knowing where we were at all times. She had to know who our friends were and what we were doing with them. She insisted that if we said we would be gone for an hour, we would be gone for an hour or less. We had to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn to cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trash and all sorts of chores. She always insisted on us telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time we were teenagers, she could read our minds and had eyes in the back of her head. Mum didn't let our friends just hoot at the gate when they drove up. They had to come up to the door so she could meet them. 

Now that most of us have left home, got education and siblings and I are really grateful for having our mom. She's our 1st teacher and the best one. Without her, we wouldn't know how to deal with things now. So we have planned a special celebration for her tomorrow. I hope she'll love it. ^^

mum at work ^^

May 10, 2013

Dear Mommy

Dear mommy,

Everyday I watch you so busy running the house. It's fun watching and trying to copy you on your every move. You laughed when I try but I guess that's normal for a baby. I get so curious with everything. It's like the activities at home are never ending.

One of my favorite activity is hovering the carpet with a machine called vacuum. At least that's what you call it although I have no idea what vacuum means. I just know you'll be rushing to the hallway, opening a huge door and inside there is was. A huge machine with 2 wheels and a very long tail. Sometimes I made you mad by playing with the door and going inside the store room where the machine is kept. You said it's dirty but I just thought it's fun. When you're ready to vacuum, you pulled a long cable from the machine and plugged it on the wall. Then I know which button to press next. But every time I press a loud noise come out from the machine and it freaks me out I'll be running to you for a hug. Then all would be alright. You said there are a lot of vacuum cleaning types and styles sold here at John Lewis.

Another one of my favorite activity in the house is cooking. The house smells heaven when you cook. I hate baby food. I want curry and lamb. Oh yes. You heard me. It amazes me how you can cook in a very short time. You said you used another loud machine that makes your life easier. I know because I can hear it miles away. The machine can chop onion or whatever and it won't teared your eyes. And you love it. It saves time too. I think it is called chopper or food processor and it's essential for mom who wants to save time. You said food processors are easily available online here waiting to find a home.

It's fun mom. Everything seems new, exciting and I want to explore all. But for now I think I'll just eat my toes to find out what they taste like.

With love,
Your little baby.

I wish I can write a letter like this to my mom when I was a kid. 
Happy Mother's Day. ^^

Me and Mom :)

May 7, 2013

Here I Lay my Trust

I have some unreasonable fears. One of them is messing up my own fate.
Isn't that kind of like an oxymoron? Wouldn't messing up my fate be just another part of my fate? No, my mind doesn't operate in such logical ways. But the theme of this post now is fate, not how illogical my mind can be.

I truly believe in fate. I do. I truly believe that someday I'll look back on these times and say, thank goodness it didn't work out that way, otherwise I would have never ____________.

But today is not someday. Today is today and today I'm losing the skip in my step, the sparkle of hope in my eyes. I know Allah has plans in store for us, plans that are much greater than anything we could conceive on our own. I love this thought. I have faith that it's true. God knows what will truly make us happy while we so often don't.

Now I sit at my study desk in this little apartment, eating pretzel that I bought last night, while waiting to go to class. It's yummy. And I can't help but wondering, where would this food tech course take me? Would I stuck forever doing the things I don't love? What if my perfect job's just around the corner and I obliviously threw it away? Blah, blah, blah... These thoughts keep my mind busy. It's a terrible pattern. A pattern I intend to change.

I'll just put all my trust in Him. Every little bit.

May 4, 2013

Our Little Infinity

I can't talk about our love story, so I will talk about math. I am not a mathematician, but I know this: There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There's .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I'm likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn't trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I'm grateful.

- The Fault in Our Stars by John Green, page 260

p.s: My another favorite page ever. 

No One is Flawless

Criticism: (n.) The expression of disapproval of someone or something based on perceived faults or mistake.

I think accepting criticism is quite tough to learn. Human nature is based on the desire to be right and the fear of being wrong. We tend to to get angry and upset when others point out our mistakes and flaws. But we’re all wrong at some point, it’s just a matter of accepting we can’t always be right. And that’s okay.

We can allow our emotions to get the best of us. We can take things for how they really are and deal with them. If we're always right, there would be no room for improvement and to learn. Our poor decisions and misjudgments allow us to become better, you know. Let's learn to accept the criticism of others, don’t go into defense mode. Take it as you will and seek out the opportunity to progress in the world. The most successful people in the world were never right at first time. No one expects us to be perfect or flawless. It’s not about the mistakes, it’s what you do afterwards that makes the difference, which is so simple. 

Over the course of 4 years in university, I've yet to learn the acceptance of criticism. It’s a weakness I recognize in myself and I’m working on it. So, I'm not just writing this to remind you, but also to remind myself. Viva voce examination is just around the corner and I'm gonna prepare myself to accept every comment and answer every question. It's a final key to finish my degree, so I'm going to nail it.

May 3, 2013

A Shout into a Void

 "..I am in the mood of poetry. Do you have anything memorize?"
  "Let us go then, you and I," I started nervously, "When the evening is spread out against the sky, like a patient etherized upon a table."

  "Slower," he said.

  I felt bashful, like I had when I'd first told him of An Imperial Affliction.
  "Um, okay. Okay.
   Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
   The muttering retreats
   Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels,
   And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
   Streets that follow like a tedious argument
   Of insidious intent
   To lead you to an overwhelming question...
   Oh do not ask, 'What is it?'
   Let us go and make our visit."

  "I'm in love with you," he said quietly.

  "Augustus," I said.

  "I am," he said. He was staring at me, and I could see the corners of his eyes crinkling. "I'm in love with you, and I'm not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things. I'm in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into a void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we're all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we'll ever have, and I am in love with you."

 - The Fault in Our Stars by John Green, page 153.

p.s: This is my favorite page ever. 


May 1, 2013

Every Little Bit of You

These are my hands
small as they may be.
I promise to never
let anything harm
you, or anyone
take your happiness
away from you.
I promise to always
be your person,
someone you
can run to for whatever
reason it may be:
a shoulder to cry on,
arms to run to,
a hand to hold.
I promise to never
judge you or dictate
what’s right or wrong.
I promise to always
love every inch,
every ounce,
every little bit of you.

p.s: I dedicate this to all my friends who's getting engaged and married this year. :)

I am Iron Man

I'm not a lifetime comic book fan. Thanks to Ifo for introducing me to Marvel superheroes, and now I'm an avid fan of them. Iron Man 3 is such a great film. This isn't Shakespearean Thor, or honourable Captain America. But they're all hot! This is wise-cracking Iron Man, with his unpredictability being his greatest weapon.

The story line this time shows Tony Stark’s world being torn apart by the Mandarin and after a near death experience he starts an odyssey of rebuilding and retribution. By now I think it’s undeniable that no one could play the role of Tony Stark quite like Robert Downey Jr. does as once again he delivers an exquisite performance which is funny, smart and quite spectacular and hot. And the additions of both Ben Kingsley and Guy Pearce leave the biggest mark which makes the movie even more awesome. 

So do I need to review more about Iron Man 3? I'm sure you already know how epic this movie is. It's not that I'm lazy to write but it isn't so easy to exaggerate know, it's like you were experiencing the greatest moment ever and there are no words can describe to people how great it was. So I'm just gonna tell you my favorite jaw-dropping, awesome scenes from Iron Man 3.

The moment when......

....Tony said, "I have to protect the one thing that I can't live without. That's you," to Pepper. Oh, that moment! Okay, this doesn't count.

....Tony called his suit to rescued Pepper when their house got bombed. I'm more worried about the house and the expensive cars.

....Tony's teaming up with a cute, precocious boy named Harley, which gives Tony his Dora the Explorer watch.

....the Mandarin's caught red-handed and he turns out to be a fake villain, he's just a drunk British old man names Trevor. I love the twist there. Ifo told me that according to comic, the Mandarin has some magics as his power, but now it's twisted and I love it.

....Iron Man saves 13 people who fall out of the plane, without Tony being in the suit!

....Killian draws out fire from his mouth like a dragon. He's an excellent villain.

....all Tony's armors come in action all at once. They're all awesome! Even cooler than Transformers.

....the infuriated Pepper gets up from fire and kicks ass!

Sorry for the spoilers. :p 


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