August 30, 2013

Lessons of a Lifetime

1. Never cancel lunch/dinner plans by text message.

2. If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.

3. Always use ‘we’ when referring to your home team or your government.

4. When entrusted with a secret, keep it.

5. Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

6. Don’t dumb it down.

7. You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.

8. Expect the seat in front of you to recline. Prepare accordingly.

9. Hold your heroes to a high standard.

10. Never lie to your doctor.

11. All guns are loaded.

12. The best way to show thanks is to wear it. Even if it’s only once.

13. Take a vacation of your cell phone, internet, and TV once a year.

14. A handshake beats an autograph.

15. Don’t linger in the doorway. In or out.

16. If you choose to go in drag, don’t sell yourself short.

17. If you want to know what makes you unique, sit for a caricature.

18. Be mindful of what comes between you and the Earth. Always buy good shoes, tires, and sheets.

19. When you’re with new friends, don’t just talk about old friends.

20. When traveling, keep your wits about you.

21. It’s never too late for an apology.

22. If you have the right of way, take it.

23. You don’t get to choose your own nickname.

24. When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.

25. Never push someone off a dock.

26. Under no circumstances should you ask a woman if she’s pregnant.

27. It’s not enough to be proud of your ancestry; live up to it.

28. Don’t make a scene.

29. When giving a thank you speech, short and sweet is best.

30. Know when to ignore the camera.

31. Never gloat.

32. Invest in good luggage.

33. Make time for your mom on your birthday. It’s her special day, too.

34. When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.

35. Sympathy is a crutch, never fake a limp.

36. Give credit. Take blame.

37. Suck it up every now and again.

38. Don’t stare.

39. Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.

40. If you've made your point, stop talking.

41. Admit it when you’re wrong.

42. If you offer to help don’t quit until the job is done.

43. Look people in the eye when you thank them.

44. Thank the bus driver.

45. Never answer the phone at the dinner table.

46. Forgive yourself for your mistakes.

47. Know at least one good joke.

48. Don’t boo. Even the ref is somebody’s son.

49. Know how to cook one good meal.

50. Be cool to younger kids. Reputations are built over a lifetime.

51. It’s okay to go to the movies by yourself.

52. Don’t lose your cool. Especially at work.

53. Always thank the host.

54. If you don’t understand, ask before it’s too late.

55. Know the size of your boy/girlfriend’s clothes.

56. There is nothing wrong with a plain T-shirt.

57. Be a good listener. Don’t just wait for your turn to talk.

58. Keep your word.

59. In college, always sit in the front. You’ll stand out immediately.

60. Carry your mother’s bags. She carried you for 9 months.

61. Be patient with airport security. They’re just doing their jobs.

62. Don’t be the talker in a movie.

63. You are what you do, not what you say.

64. Be kind. Everyone has a hard fight ahead of them.

65. An hour with grandparents is time well spent. Ask for advice when you need it.

66. Don’t litter.

67. If you have a sister, get to know her boyfriend. Your opinion is important.

68. You won’t always be the strongest or the fastest. But you can be the toughest.

69. Never call someone before 9 am or after 9 pm.

70. Make the little things count.

71. There is a fine line between looking sultry and slutty. Find it.

72. You’re never too old to need your mom.

73. Ladies, if you make the decision to wear heels on the first date, commit to keeping them on and keeping your trap shut about how much your feet kill.

74. Know the words to your national anthem.

75. Smile at strangers.

76. Make goals.

77. Being old is not dictated by your bedtime.

78. If you have to fight, punch first and punch hard.

79. Guys, respect women. 

80. Family always comes first. 

August 26, 2013

The Fangirl Moments

Today I didn't do much things and didn't go anywhere, was just staying at home, reading tweets and watching TV instead. But, it was a wonderful day and I'm very excited of these 2 things that came up today.

First off, I got to see 'NSYNC reuniting and performing live on stage on MTV VMA 2013 this morning. It was sooooo good to see them back together again. Really, it felt like the old times. I've always wanted my 90s back, that's the best era, you know. And it's absolutely the night for the President of Pop, Justin Timberlake. I loved it how he dove into a medley of his hits including SexyBack, Like I Love You, My Love and Cry Me A River, followed by a not-so-surprising performance of Girlfriend and Bye Bye Bye by ‘NSYNC. And that's where I screamed.

Congrats to Justin for winning The Video Vanguard Award, also known as the Lifetime Achievement Award, which is given to musicians who have made a profound effect on the MTV culture, something Justin has done so many times. It's touching when Justin dedicated his award to ‘NSYNC. Ironically, Britney Spears, his most famous ex, was the last artist to receive the award in 2011. Other winners include the Beastie Boys, Madonna and Janet Jackson. I'm so proud of my teenage crush. I love you, Justin. You'll always be my crush. :p

Annnnnndd second off, oh gosh, I don't know how to put this into words. Well, I actually know. Okay here we go: THE FAULT IN OUR STARS IS NOW A MOVIE! Have you read the book? No? How could you not read the awesome book? Dude, you gotta get the book now and read it. Don't wait till the movie comes out to know the story, it'll be less fun. 

It's written by deary John Green, who was just posting a picture of the set of the film via Instagram. And I am so psyched! So the film will be casting by Ansel Elgort (newcomer, I guess) and Shailene Woodley (played Alex in The Descendants). Oh gosh! It's like a dream come true. I did wish that the book will be filmed someday. I can't believe it's happening. Finally..Hazel Grace, Gus, phalanxifor, An Imperial Affliction, etc..are now real. You'd know what I'm talking about if you read the book. :p

By the way, click here to read my review of the book: Aemy's Review on The Fault In Our Stars.

Carrying the Torch of Ramadan Forward

It's been weeks since Ramadan has passed. Our Qurans have shut. Our mosques have emptied. And our hearts have once again filled with the love of life, the hatred of death and the desires that consume us. And so while we find ourselves again vulnerable to the very same struggles that plagued us before Ramadan, let us not forget the very purpose of our efforts during that blessed month. Let us not allow the fruits of Ramadan to be lost. And let us not miss out on the very purpose of our fasting.

If, during Ramadan, we're able to keep ourselves from eating and drinking out of fear of Allah, are we not able to keep ourselves from forbidden things after Ramadan, out of that same fear? During Ramadan, we could wake up before sunrise to feed our bodies. But after Ramadan we sleep through dawn and starve our souls. Let us not allow ourselves to be conquered. The power and choice is ours.

How do we continue the spirit of Ramadan for the entire year, and throughout our lives?

1. Guard your prayers. 
During Ramadan, many of us make sure to pray every prayer on time. Continue to guard your prayers, because surely they will guard you. 

2. Remember Allah by staying close to the Quran. 
During Ramadan, many of us spend our nights and days reading Quran. Remembering Allah by staying close to the Quran everyday will protect you from evil and keep your heart polished.

3. Think more and talk less. 
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: “Sometimes a person says a thing which pleases Allah, and in return Allah raises his status; and sometimes a person says something which displeases Allah, and it takes him to hell” (Bukhari).

4. Repent often. 
Many of us seek forgiveness from Allah during Ramadan, but abandon this practice once Ramadan's over. Keep in mind that the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ used to repent to Allah a hundred times every single day. Repenting often keeps our hearts clean and always connected to Allah.

- From the book Reclaim Your Heart by Yasmin Mogahed.

August 24, 2013

If I Were a Dude

I've never wished to be a man, and it gets on my last nerve when I hear a girl wishing she was a man because you are what you are and wishing to be something or someone else is a sign of weakness. Yet, it’s interesting to think of what could have been, you know. Obviously I can't know for sure how things would be if I were a man, but I can at least imagine it and come out with a hypothesis.

So, for starters, if I were a man I think I'd probably be emotionally crippled. I mean, I already have a hard time expressing my feelings as a girl, add some testosterone and a drizzle of macho pride to that and you have a concrete wall. Yet, I think I'd be a family guy with no commitment issues, but I'd have a big problem handling rejection, and it wouldn't matter how many chances I blew because after all my pride is what matters the most, or so I'd think. 

If I were a man, I'd probably be a workaholic, burying myself in work to avoid social duties. I'd also be into sci-fi and mystery books. I wouldn't be one of those guys who drool over cheap singers, but I'd appreciate beauty for sure. I'd probably have some very good female friends and some male friends who are the complete opposite of me. I would have a couple of crushes and would have my heart broken a few times with unrequited love.

I'd generally be a calm person, trying to do the right thing when faced with a crisis, to be strong and not to panic, because after all I'm a man and I should live up to that title. I'd be in constant competition with others especially in the work place. I'd feel responsible for everything that is anything. I’d have a good relationship with my brothers, probably not as good as my relationship with them as a sister, for some reason, but I'd have a totally different life style, and for some reason I feel that I'd be my mother's favorite son, but of course she wouldn't say that.

Well, as I said this is all hypothetical. Who knows? Maybe if I were a man I would be a complete loser. In any case all I can say is: Thank God I’m a woman.

August 22, 2013

Love Yourself, Kiddo

And kid, you've got to love yourself. You've got to wake up at four in the morning, brew black coffee and stare at the birds drowning in the darkness of the dawn. You've got to sit next to the man at the train station who’s reading your favorite book and start a conversation. You've got to come home after a bad day and burn your skin from a shower. Then you've got to wash all your sheets until they smell of lemon detergent you bought at the local grocery store. You've got to stop taking everything so damn personally. You're not the moon kissing the black sky. You've got to compliment someones crooked brows at an art fair and tell them that their eyes remind you of green swimming pools in mid July. You've got to stop letting yourself get upset about things that won't matter in 2 years. Sleep in on Saturday mornings and wake yourself up early on Sunday. You've got to stop worrying about what you're going to tell her when she finds out. You've got to stop over thinking why he stopped caring about you over 6 months ago. You've got to stop asking everyone for their opinions. Love yourself, kiddo. You've got to love yourself.

August 19, 2013

Red is Courage, Red is Love

Right now, I'm on the cusp. Ending one chapter and preparing for the one ahead. It's terrifying. I'm sick with not knowing what to do. And more than anything, I'm so embarrassed I have no plan. I'm almost 23 and I have no idea what I should do next. But I did apply for jobs. So that's why I've been a bit scattered down. I'm overwhelmed by everything and I need to reach out. 

In the meantime, I'm still on the mode of Aidilfitri. Me and the whole family were going to Ifo's raya open house yesterday. The meals were great and everyone was wonderful. I was glad to get the chance to meet Ifo's relatives that I have and haven't met before, both from Brunei and Dusun sides. They're all nice people. I was blushing when they called me "sumandak Nazri (Ifo's name at home)" instead of my name, and when they asked us about getting married. But I liked that, I liked being teased that way. Heeee.. :p
Surprisingly, Ifo's relatives at Brunei side are related to my family. So yes, me and Ifo are quite related. Like, Ifo is an uncle and I am a niece. Wow. I'm dating my uncle. LOL. It doesn't matter though. We're still allowed, right? :p 

We're here!

Red is courage, red is love. :)

The Baks were there too. ^^

August 16, 2013

Go Back to Square One

One thing you need to learn about life: you have to get used to square one. Do you know what "square one" means? Square one is the initial stage or starting point. When someone says back to square one, it means that he's going back to beginning to start again. 

When you're recovering from anything, square one sounds like the worst option. When you're learning something new, square one sounds so tedious and you just wanna jump to square 60 already, but life doesn't work that way. And I know most of us wished it did, but because it doesn't, we have to get used to square one. Make a home at square one. Decorate it with recovery and paint it with patience. When you realize you have to take a few steps back, to understand someone or something, just go back to this home you've made in square one. 

Be familiar with the different rooms, that when you go, you know exactly which one you need to sit in; understanding, trust, love, hope and knowledge. But there's one extra room; fear. Paint it the brightest yellow, vacuum the dust and scrape off the ceiling. Open up the windows and let the air flow in. Don't close the door. Drown fear in the bathtub, instead of being afraid of it. Be familiar with square one, that when you have to go back, that when you open up the front door, you find yourself kissing the ground and dancing with joy. Let square one be a safe place for you and not just an awkward, shameful walk home.

When all you know has been burned to the ground and your home on square 71 is in ashes, don't be afraid to sprint to square one and crash into the couch that holds so many dried up tears. Let square one be a home. Beginnings don't have to be hard and the start of something doesn't have to be scary. Square one has a welcome mat and the key has always been in your pocket. 

When you hit the negatives, that home you built is still right there. Let yourself sit there for however long you need until things are okay again. Then say “see you soon, old friend”. Be comfortable with square one.

I've been there and done that.

The Fringe Benefits of Failure

August 14, 2013

Eid Throwback

Hey, I'm back with a little recap! It's been a week now since 1st Syawal and a lot of wonderful things have happened. Praise to Allah for these gifts; my family and friends. Aidilfitri would be less meaningful without them. 

On the 1st day of Syawal, I was wearing a pair of baju kurung made of 3d digital flower printed fabric. They're basically light blue and pink, and there were some faux diamonds on them. So that's my favorite raya costume this year. After having prayers and visiting cemetery, we headed off to Kg Pimping, my dad's village, to meet our relatives. It's great to meet my cousins. You know, it's not easy to gather with them all and hari raya is the only perfect time to do it. On the next day, we made an open house and invited relatives and friends to come over. The Baks and Ifo's parents came too. ^^ 

I also got to go out with my best friends, visited their houses and met my former teacher. It's the good old days all over again! And the days went on and I really had a great time!

That is my cousin.

Family photo. It's incomplete, my 2nd sister and her kids weren't there

Oh you know this one :p

Aemy and The Baks Eid version

With friends. Screw the camera. 

August 7, 2013

Eid Mubarak

Ma'as-salama, ya Ramadan. Ahlan wa sahlan, ya Syawal. 

Dear everyone, I want to wish you a Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri. I'm sorry for all the things I've done that made you feel uncomfortable or uneasy. I'm just a human being that's bound to make mistakes and sometimes I didn't realize it. I'm sorry. Thanks for your precious moments to visit and read my mediocre blog. Thanks for your support in my writing. Thanks for your lovely comments and feedback. They meant a lot to me. It's such an honor to have readers like you guys. You are awesome and I love you. Eid Mubarak! :) 

August 6, 2013

It's Okay

The time I had to write a thesis for my Food Tech course in the campus is up there with some of the hardest things I've learned. It's tough and broke me to pieces once, I almost give up. Alhamdulillah, all the hard work, determination, tears, depression and sleepless nights paid off. I left the faculty with smile and feeling  proud. I agree with myself that in the end, it's worth it.

Well, in retrospect, I much prefer those lessons than those with no definite answers, no charts. I'm turning 23 this year. It's odd. It seems as though far too much has happened for it to only be 23 years of lessons. Another hard lesson, which I'm still in the mere introductory chapters of the book, is the concept of friendships mattering a lifetime, affecting your life forever, yet sometimes fleeting. I didn't get the chance to say goodbye to my friends properly and most of them have gone back to their hometowns. I wish I can do that on convocation. 

It doesn't mean your friendship meant nothing just because you don't talk anymore, right? Or that you moved on or moved up. Not at all. In fact, sometimes, your past friendships grow dearer with time. We all are busy. We all are at different points in our lives. And sometimes, people drift. 

That's okay. That's what I'm learning: it's okay.

At the time you're close, you will remember being close at that time. We change everyday, our lives change everyday. But at that time, you and that person, your friendship served a purpose, taught a lesson, helped you both grow. 

My friends, you're always in my heart. Those times, those places, those moments..they're forever treasured in my heart. They made me who I am. Thank you, dear friends. And though we may not speak often, or perhaps ever, I guarantee you, you're always, always in my heart.

Then and now.

..and if we don't meet no more in this world,
then I'll meet you in the next one,
and don't be late, don't be late...


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