September 23, 2014

Last Hope



I know..I blog less lately. It's not that I'm busy...it's just, I don't feel like blogging these days. I've lost my words. I've lost my mojo. Sometimes I feel like quitting this blog, and when I tell that to my friends, they say "hell no!". And I'm like, "just kidding!".
Well, when you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place, right? Fine, I won't quit. Dear bloggy, I'm sorry for having the thought of letting go of you. I don't know..maybe I just want to get away. Away from everything and everyone. But where would I go? I feel so miserable when I don't know what to do and where to go. I'm a misguided ghost, walking and running with no directions. I've been running but I'm still behind. 

I wish I can write different things, something happier. I wish I can tell some good stories again here. There's a lot of stories I want to share actually, the good and bad ones. I want to write them all. But not now. So much things going on..personal, family issue, friends, others' problems become mine, future thingy, etc... Maybe I worry too much.

By the way, dear Anne, if you read this, I want to thank you for your uplifting advice and suggestions the other day. And dear Arms, thanks for the virtual hug. And my close friends from the "High School Never Ends" group chat, you guys are awesome. Thanks so much for brighten up my days..

Let's keep calm and watch this video: Last Hope by Paramore, live in Chicago. This song means a lot to me. 





I don't even know myself at all
I thought I would be happy by now
The more I try to push it
I realize, gotta let go of control

Gotta let it happen, gotta let it happen
Gotta let it happen, so let it happen

It's just a spark
But it's enough to keep me going
And when it's dark out, no one's around
It keeps glowing

Every night I try my best to dream
Tomorrow makes it better
Then I wake up to the cold reality
And not a thing is changed

But it will happen, gotta let it happen
Gotta let it happen, gotta let it happen

It's just a spark
But it's enough to keep me going
And when it's dark out, no one's around
It keeps glowing

And the salt in my wounds isn't burning anymore than it used to
It's not that I don't feel the pain, it's just I'm not afraid of hurting anymore
And the blood in these veins isn't pumping any less than it ever has
And that's the hope I have, the only thing I know that's keeping me alive






ps: I'll write a better post next time. Till then. 






2 comments:

  1. Same thing happen to me too Aemy. I feel like want to write but I dunno what to write. Try to write sikit-sikit but it end to draft..hahaha..

    ReplyDelete

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