Be a Special Idiot

A few nights ago someone asked me if I’d read the article, "26 reasons not to run a marathon". It's a few nights before I joined the Borneo International Marathon (BIM) 2015. I hadn't read it. But now I have. Though the author brought up some great points, like running marathons isn't for everybody and it could physically damage you if you're not properly prepared, etc...there's no reason to instill fear.

There's no need to make people feel like their heart's going to stop or their knees are going to fail them, or that they're wrong for only wanting to run a marathon to brag or flood Instagram with pictures of finisher medals. That's their right. So now that I've read the top reasons NOT to run a marathon, and I've JOINED a marathon on 3rd May 2015, I've compiled my own little list: 19 reasons to run a marathon.

Here goes.

1. Feel like a super hero

Super Man, Wonder Woman, Batman, Flash, Black Widow...pick whichever tickles your fancy because you'll feel like any one of them.

2. Improve discipline in other areas of your life. 

During training periods you can be disciplined in every aspect in your life from work to diet to exercise. There's something about being able to focus your mind for hours upon hours that really sharpens it. Discipline brings a whole level of clarity to life.

3. It's a great people replacement

You recently got dumped? You and your best friend fighting? You moved away from your family? You lonely? Well marathon training can be your friend. Yes, like the author of the other list said: You will sacrifice part of your social life but when you're missing part of that social life to begin with, endless hours of running can certainly be a stand-in for a few months. And if you join a running group or training team, you might just make new friends.

4. You might make new friends

I met some new friends at the BIM; from kids to old people, from the locals to foreigners. It's fun. Yay for new friends!

5. It restores your faith in humanity

I know it sounds depressing, but having perfect strangers, both fellow runners and onlookers, encourage you when you're in pain and want to quit restores your faith in humanity. I've never seen so much goodwill and willingness to pump others up happen in a non-tragic setting.

6. It gives you an excuse to celebrate

Marathon days are pretty much better than birthdays in that you get to celebrate your own awesomeness on other than just the day you're born. People will want to take you out to eat, your parents will reinforce how wonderful they think you are and your partner will be reassured that you're the most amazing person on the planet. Selfish, I know, but true.

7. You'll discover what works for you

In terms of food as fuel, shoes, clothes, you'll find out what works for you and what doesn't.

8. You'll help worthy causes

Raising money for good causes gives you motivation to train, plus that extra self-righteousness that comes from doing good.

9. You'll learn about new products

Ever had chafing on your thighs? Underarms? Not yet, but you will and that's when you'll learn about new products like Body Glide or creative ways to use Vaseline.

10. You'll learn more about yourself

Hours upon hours running give you plenty of time to be alone with your thoughts. You'll learn what's really bothering you in some aspects in life and you'll have time to mentally sort through and figure out solutions. It's a very meditative time.

11. You'll push your limits

If you say, "I can't," to a lot of stuff, marathon training will rid you of that shitty habit. When you're not training, no matter how many marathons you've run, the thought of running double-digits is outrageous. "I can't," you might think. But when you're out there and you do it despite you mind's can'ts, you learn to push yourself past any former perceived limits. It's exhilarating.

12. You'll feel fitter, stronger than ever

There's nothing more horrible than slipping on your skinny jeans and realizing they're the only skinny ones in the situation. That doesn't happen during marathon training. You feel like a fit, sexy beast.

13. Bragging rights

Oh your friend ran a 10 km? How cute. You? You ran that 10 km after you already run 20 miles. Boom.

14. Improved cardiovascular health

But this is only true if you keep running. Don't run a marathon and then give up running altogether. Be cute and run that 10 km with your friends, you don't have to run marathons all the time to remain healthy.

15. Amazing sleep

You'll never sleep as well as you do after a long run. It's just blissful.

16. Inspiration

Whether you finally become inspiring to yourself or you're inspiring others or you happen to meet some inspirational folks, there's no shortage of inspiration when it comes to marathons. Plus, when life gets to sucking as it inevitably does at times, you can look back on that accomplishment and remember how at one point, you felt freaking invincible.

17. Post-marathon feast

No one can feast like a person who just ran a marathon. I'm personally not too hungry after a marathon, but the simple fact that at that moment I have the freedom to choose whatever I want to eat without guilt is enough for me to not regret the months of training.

18. Swag

One of my favorite parts about running a marathon is the expo: Free food, swag and good times taking pictures and getting free gears. It's like a carnival. Who doesn't love that? Plus at the end of the race you get a medal. If you're a lazy ass kid who didn't like to run, like I was, then you didn't get medals for this kind of thing when you're little. Now you do.

19. Because you want to

My biggest pet peeve is people telling others what they can't or shouldn't do. Your brother double-dared you to run a marathon? Show him you're in and run it! You wanted to do this before you turn 40? Do it! Wear your medal to your 40th birthday party if you want. If running a marathon is what you want, and you're overweight or scared you're going to drop dead during the race, then get healthy, lose weight and then train. My moral: There's always a million reasons to NOT do something, but as far as I can see the best reason TO DO something is because you want to.

Quick Update

Hey, everyone. It's been a crazy month. I joined a camp for 3 days at Manis Manis Nature Resort, became a facilitator, my team won The Best Team award, I got to meet new friends, got to know my students and other teachers closer and we had so much. It was awesome, despite the fact that I can't sleep at nights because I heard things..well, you know, the place's haunted. I came home with bruises all over my legs. Damn you, ghost. Lol. 

the winning team

Then I went to Kuala Lumpur and stayed there for a week. It's a sudden trip, so unplanned. I was actually sending my cousin off as he got a job at KLIA as an immigration officer, and at the same time being his companion to adapt in a new place, and looking for house/room to rent. We grew up together, we're like brother and sister, so I can't just let him do everything all by himself. Yes, he's grown-up, but he's always like a little brother to me and I care about him. Plus he'll be away for a long time and we can't see each other often, so it's the only chance for me to give what I can as a sister. 

with my cousin and his friend

And recently I had a brief catch up with my friends after a month. Ah I missed them so much. We went to beach, ate the newly trending ice cream in vase and watched a beautiful sunset. 

Wait, did I mention that I'm teaching again? Ah yes, but my previous contract has ended and for now I'm just staying at home, waiting for a call from school officer to renew my contract. I sound like a freelance teacher, huh. Well, it's fun somehow. Unlike regular teachers, up to this day I've taught more than 2 subjects; Maths, Science, English, Music, Visual Art, ICT, Technical Skills, and Geography. Lol. 

So that's all for now. Till next time. ^^

One Night at Circus

The finest of pleasures are always the unexpected ones. - Erin M., The Night Circus

The Great British Circus is in town!!! 

I went to the circus with my friends on Saturday night at Likas Sport Complex. It was my first experience ever and it's truly amazing! Oh what's not to love? There were funny clowns, acrobats, wheel of death, globe of death, flying trapeze, etc. Mesmerizing! You should pay a visit too! It's worth every penny. Even now it brings a big smile to my face. Plus, we got the chance to greet and take pictures with the performers. They're so friendly! 

The fun didn't just stop there because we headed to Escapee after having some McDonald. Yes, we played the escape game again! Since we're still in the mood of circus, we chose to play in The Circus room. It's the hardest among all the rooms. We challenged ourselves to win or break the record. But damn, we lost the game. We're already at the end of the puzzles, we're on the verge of the last door but we ran out of time and didn't make it. I think if we had 10 more minutes or so, we could win. You see, fighting against time is one of the hardest battle in the world. Time couldn't be kept at bay huh. Still, we had so much fun!!

Escape and Evade

Yay! My friends and I got a chance to play escape game at Escapee, KK! There are 3 different rooms: The Circus, Time Travel and Prison Break. We chose Prison Break. We had to solve a series of puzzles to escape the room within 1 hour.

First of all, 1 hour goes ungodly fast when you're in an escape game. You know all of those times when you wished that time would go faster? You never have that problem in these games. By the time the clock is running down you'll be begging for more minutes like you've never begged before.

Secondly, the puzzles challenge your brain in ways that not many attractions can offer. You're forced to think and work with your team to solve challenges that you don't normally face. We did so hard to try to figure out the locks combinations in order to unveil the next clue.

We had a complete blast playing this room as it was challenging enough to keep you completely engrossed in the game play, but not challenging enough to be discouraging. We learned a lot in our first escape game experience, including the fact that you really need to work as a team in order to be successful. Another thing we came to realize is that you can't look at the same object for too long. It's a waste of time! Get fresh eyes to look at something if you're stuck. They were inventive and really made us think outside the box, which was very fun. The clues led to a code to unlock the next step of your game, but how the clues were put together was totally different, so it was lucky that we had some "geniuses" in our team.

It's not easy, but we made it! We escaped the room in 52 minutes, just 8 minutes before the time's up. Ultimately, it's a great way to spend time with friends. And teamwork is the key. We had so much fun. It tests your intellect without making you feel stupid. We'll definitely be coming back to play again!

Perfect, Sweet-Filled Birthday

3rd October 2014 was my 24th birthday. And, inevitably, I find myself considering where I am, where I've been..whether I'm who I expected to be at this age, whether I'm doing what I expected to do. Truth is: I am and I'm not. Some things have fallen right into place, right where I always imagined they would. Other things, though, have been surprises. Good and bad ones. But all of it, I'm very happy to say, feels right. As if it's inevitable. Certain, in the most wonderful of ways. And if I have one wish for 24, it'll be holding on to that. The feeling that everything, even the unexpected, is just as it should be.

When asked how I wanted to spend my birthday, I said I just wanted to spend it with the ones I love. Just like in the past. I didn't expect any cakes, gifts or celebration. But actually that's what I really got.....

After having a movie night (Anabelle..stupid creepy doll) and sleepover (it's been soooooo long since high school) with my girls (Farah and Jana) at Farah's place, Ifo took me out for a date on my birthday. It's a simple, lovely date; just me and him, watching Dracula Untold (awesome movie!), eating pizza, talking and talking and laughing. And hey, I got new books! If I stay and Where She Went, both by Gayle Forman. 

Two days after my birthday, we went out again, with other friends this time. It was raining heavily outside and I thought that something hot or soupy would be nice, so I suggested to eat at Natural Kitchen. But Ifo insisted to go to Secret Recipe, so we did. When we got there, Selvin and Russel were already waiting at the table. They hadn't ordered anything but plain water. Then Ifo excused himself to call Jasper outside, so we waited for them while browsing the menus. 

Few minutes later, Ifo and the rest appeared at the stairs; Ifo (playing ukulele), Desmond (holding a cake), Jasper, Mark and Carol. They're all singing out loud a Happy Birthday song, clapping..and I was....oh my God, I was so speechless, so surprised..I didn't know what to say. I just laughed and felt touched and ashamed at the same time. Touched, because I didn't expect any of those and it's been so long since I had that kind of surprise celebration..embarrassed, because everybody in the restaurant was looking at me and clapping along. Suddenly I became the centre of attention. Lol. It was all Ifo's idea..he'd been planning everything for almost a week, he brought The Baks and Wonder Women (girls group consisting me, Carol, Nelly, Fytt and Etha, but only Carol available that day) together as a team to celebrate my birthday. How nice! They even made a secret group chat to discuss the whole things. 

It was so sweet and wonderful. Thank you, everyone..thank you so much for surprising me good, I owe you guys a big time. I'm so grateful to have you guys in my life. And darling Ifo, I can't thank you enough..I love you. :)

post-sleepover

I'm a happy birthday girl

the cake was awesome

my sweethearts

I love you ^^

Breathing

"Your true passion should feel like breathing. It's that natural." - Oprah

I loved watching The Oprah Winfrey Show and I almost never missed an episode. That seems to be at the center of what she stands for. Self-awareness, consciousness, knowledge of your spirit and your truth and your own physical presence. I think the important message is to question, recognize, and improve yourself. What I appreciate most about Oprah is how confidently she talks about personal passions. How wisely she speaks of that inner fire, the feeling of destiny, of things that make you feel most yourself. I've been asked why I write. And when I answer, I admit that I don't write to be read. I write for the sake of writing. For the process, the struggle, and the unique elation that comes during the sweet, split-second moment that inspiration strikes. Mostly, I write to know myself. To me, writing's about discovering the shape of my thoughts and then tracing and retracing that shape until it becomes something clear and crisp, something I can recognize, maybe even something I can understand. 

Honestly, some days the words don't come easily. Some days I find myself forcing them out, racking my brain or my journal..or, well, random internet prompts..for that magic spark of the idea. Other days, though, Oprah's right, it's really like breathing. Instinctive and spontaneous, habitual and liberating and subconscious. Those days, writing is a sign of life. But today, this is all I can write. I was going to write a recap of Syawal, to tell a story about the wonderful celebration of Hari Raya. Well...you know how good the pictures can tell the story. ;)

Raya with family:

Raya with friends:

Syawal has always been a great month because it's when all of the family members gather together and it's also when I can meet my friends. Sometimes I wish I could go back to those moments and freeze them. Family and friends are my passion. True passion feels like breathing. They're the sign of my life. :)

Like a Crescendo

Had a picnic at the beach with my friends yesterday on Labor Day. It's a simple picnic; KFC combo, mats, ukulele, volley ball, frisbee and  music. Simple yet sweet. :)

For whatever reason, I've always found the most clarity either while I'm at the beach or while I'm with my loved ones. Maybe it's something about the inevitable stillness in those situations, or maybe it's because they sometimes feel like movie moments. Like they deserve a soundtrack with indie songs and some kind of giant, fill-your-heart crescendo (found this phrase in a book I was reading..lol).

Either way, just a day at the beach and it became very clear: Life is good. 

(despite the fact that I'm having a flu now, life's still good)

So how's your day? ^^

It's Great to Be a Nerd

It's awesome to be a nerd. I don't know what the world's gonna be like by the time you understand this. I don't know what it's gonna mean to be a nerd when you're a young woman. For me, when I was growing up, being a nerd meant that I liked things that were a little weird, that took a lot of effort to appreciate and understand. It meant that I loved science, playing board games, reading books and really understanding what went on in the world instead of just riding the planet through space.

When I was little, people really teased me about that and made me feel like there's something wrong with me for loving those things. Now that I'm an adult, I'm a professional nerd, and the world has changed. I think we've realized that being a nerd isn't about what you love but about how you love.

So there's gonna be a thing in your life that you love. I don't know what it's gonna be. It might be sports or science or reading or telling stories. It doesn't matter what it is. The way you love that thing and how you find other people who love it the way you do is what makes being a nerd awesome. Some of us love Harry Potter, while others love Star Trek. But we all love those things so much that we travel far to be around people who love the things that we love the way that we love them. That's why being a nerd awesome.

Don't let anyone tell you that the thing that you love is a thing that you can't love. Don't let anyone ever tell you, "You can't love that. That's for boys." I want you to be honest, honorable and kind. I want you to work hard because everything worth doing is hard. I want you to be awesome, and I'll do my very best to leave you a planet that you can still live on. Have a great life.

- Wil Wheaton

Source: Reader's Digest (April 2014 issue)

Light as Air

Recently, life has been a bit of a whirlwind. A good whirlwind, to be sure, but a whirlwind nonetheless. Last weekend left me calm and rejuvenated. Refreshed. Outdoor brunch, an all-day barbecue at the river, hangout at playground, and friends who bring out my truest self. We faced the sun and ate barbecued chickens and ate pickles and welcomed life with open arms. And something within or above or around me lifted, loosened, so that now I'm feeling light as air.

It's the new weekend and life is good, you know? Life is just so damn good.

our picnic spot

Kibambangan River

dipping in cold river

glad to have him 

brothers

the chefs

Well, I know it's the month of love. But I'm not a valentine's day person because I'm not celebrating it, but everyone can celebrate love anytime. Let's celebrate all kinds of love everyday, shall we? Romantic love, yes, but also friendship and the love of our families, our acquaintances, our old loves and new loves, puppy loves and forever loves. The love of words, of sunshine, of fresh flowers sitting on the windowsill. And let's not forget to show love, too, to those we care about and also to ourselves. Also, let us not forget self-love.

And thank you so much for all the love you've shown this little blog over the years.

Have a blast weekend. ^^

Week of Celebration

It's been a great week!!

8th January marks the 24th birthday of a friend of mine and Ifo, Jasper Olsen Francis. As requested by his girlfriend, Fenny, who's currently working in peninsular, we threw a party for him. I probably know how it feels to be in long distant relationship, ones would want their partner to have a special moment on birthday even though they're away from each other. So we ordered cheese cake and celebrated at Tanjung Aru's SugarBun. It's not really a surprise party because we didn't have enough time to set it up. We gave Jasper a superhero mask as a gift, since he looks like Aaron Taylor-Johnson and we called him KickAss. It's not even a KickAss mask, but it still made him look like one. I think it's time to introduce The Baks members to you (I'll do this on each birthday). Jasper is a pharmacist, has been Ifo's friend since high school and I met him at matriculation. He's a very nice guy to hangout with, you can never be bored when he's around because he's very friendly and talkative. What we like about him is that he's an informative, adventurous, easy-going and open-minded person. He's someone that will always be there for friends in good and bad times. When you share your problems with him, he'd come up with the best advice and solutions. And he's multitalented; karate kid, pianist, athlete. We're glad to have him as a friend. :)

On Friday, me with Ifo and my sister went back to Papar to help preparing for tahlil feast that was held on the next day. Since we couldn't attend it, we came a day earlier to help in preparation. Ifo also gave some helps in the kitchen, he's good at it and I was glad that he got along very well with my relatives; aunts, uncles, cousins, neighbors. They all love him. 

On 11th, I went to my best friend's wedding reception at Permai D'Valley Ratau. I'm genuinely happy that Rafizza's finally married to her Navy man, Lt Haffiz. We came quite late, so we missed the earlier sessions like Navy parade and some traditions, but it's okay as long as I can meet the bride and groom, see the happiness and took pictures together. There were 2 pelamin, one of them is the modern pelamin, prettily decorated in purple and white, matched the bride's purple dress. Then they changed into Dusun Lotud traditional costume to sit at the other pelamin. There's quite a vibe of Sabah on the reception, I guess they wanted to introduce Sabah to the groom's family as they're from West Malaysia. Congratulations to Rafizza and Lt Haffiz, I wish they live happily ever after. ^^

And I'm happy to announce that I got a new job, it's not like an official or day-to-day job, but as a freelance writer, I call it a job. I love it. Another web project is coming soon, it's not really a big thing but I'm gearing up. On top of that, I'll be starting a temporary job as substitute teacher again soon at a primary school. Well, this is the life of an unemployed 24-year-old lady. Blissfully content. 

happy birthday Jasper!

kickass!

Dusun Lotud traditional costume

congrats Rafizza and Lt Haffiz

Jingle Bell Rock

So how did we celebrate our 5th anniversary? Dinner at a romantic restaurant, stroll on the beach, movies.....nahh, those are typical. We did what we love to, we're just hanging out in bookshop (I just got myself John Green's Paper Towns ^^), having lunch at mamak stall and talking for hours. All those happened in the place where we had our 1st date and declared to be a couple. :p

Well it's not one-day celebration, and sometimes an anniversary isn't necessarily meant to be celebrated by 2 people. Being together for 5 years have brought us to get closer with everyone else, especially our friends, because most of our sweet moments were involving them and we wanted to share this happiness. So we cooked some simple meals, baked a cake and had dinner together at Ifo's house. Then we had karaoke til midnight while eating the cake we baked. It's really a fun night. Not to brag, but as I love cooking, I was glad to cook my recipe for my loved ones and they liked it. As the saying goes "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach", well honestly I kinda put that into practice to impress my man. Heeee... :D

On 25th, we went to Tuaran to meet Ifo's Dusun relatives as they had a little feast for Ifo's grandparents to celebrate christmas. And at night, we're invited to a christmas party at Ifo's cousins' house, and one of the cousin is Nelly's (my best friend) husband-to-be. ^^ What a small world, everyone can be related. It was a great party with beautiful decoration. Ifo and friends grabbed chance to join a game called Running Man. I never watch the show so I had no idea about it, but it's just apparently an eating competition. Each group consists of 6 persons, and every member must finish boiled egg, hot curry Maggie, ice cream, chocolate bar, a bottle of mineral water and coke as fast as possible. The foods were simple and finishing them seemed easy, the real challenge was the psycho cheers from the crowds as they shouted, "muntah..muntah..muntah!" One of our friends almost puked eating the egg, me who's watching also felt like throwing up. Their psycho really worked. Anyway, Ifo's group won 2nd place and we went home with 2 hampers and lots of treats. 

Such a nice way to end the year. ^^

cooked for the loved ones

me and Ifo with 2 beautiful christmas cakes

with my friend a.k.a biras-to-be, Nelly

enjoying meals with the hosts of the party

congrats guys!

10 Seconds of Fame

I'm officially graduated!! Yay!!! 

*fireworks*

*confetti rain*

Well, it's just an ordinary graduation ceremony. But it's probably the onetime experience, so I wanted to feel the moment. Yes, it's fun, but it's also tiring and exhausting! Plus I only ate a couple of sandwiches that day. I skipped lunch and regretted it. We waited for 2 hours before parading into the hall. The parade was my favorite part..it's glorious, you know..when you walked on red carpet into the hall and everyone's watching and applauding, accompanied with orchestral music. Oh it's wonderful. But the excitement faded a while as we had to wait for another hour before being on stage. When it's time, I could only hear my heartbeats. I went up stage, my name's mentioned, I know I was on the screens, faced the chief minister of Sabah, smiled at cameras, took scroll, said thanks, and went down smiling. That's all. 4 years of study and 10 seconds of fame. Lol! 

Exiting the hall, I ran straight away to find my lovelies. The 1st ones I met were Ifo, Jasper and Selvin. They brought me flowers! Then we went to meet my family and they had flowers for me too. I felt blessed. Being hugged and kissed by mum and dad was the most touching moment, nothing could make me happier than seeing them happy and proud. Despite the fact that I was famished and exhausted, I was glad. Unfortunately I didn't get to meet most friends after leaving the hall, we're all separated by the crowds and couldn't find each other. Everything was so brief. I wish I could see them and say goodbye because it might be difficult to meet again.

The next day was Ifo's turn. I loved it how charming he was in suit and robe. We're finally graduated together. ^^ I got to meet his family and take pictures together. The whole Baks was also there so hey, it's a party! We took as much pictures as we want at the chancellor lawn, went crazy together. Then we took off for lunch, played bowling and decided to stay at Lan's place while waiting for concert night at UMS. So we had karocks and watched Pee Mak that made me almost cry. After that we headed to Tamu Gadang and had dinner there. It's not really a cool place because it's too crowded and smokes were everywhere. And the concert was just okay..there's Azlan & The Typewriter, and a band that tried so hard to be like Paramore..whatever the band was, they performed Still Into You at slow tempo and Conspiracy. I was disappointed as they ruined the songs. 

We kinda made a history that night when a woman approached us and asked to help her finding her 2 little sons that were missing at Tamu Gadang. So we split up and looked for the kids, but we didn't find them..others did. Someone sent them to the stage and made announcement. Phew. Glad the kids were safe. Then we escaped from the place and went to the peaceful sports complex. Looking at the huge field, I recalled the orientation moment dancing on the field during our 1st week in campus 4 years ago. It felt like yesterday. Now we're leaving hogwarts and going forward to the new chapters.

Well, it's an amazing night. It made me realize how blessed I am to be surrounded by wonderful people; my family, friends, Ifo, the Baks, bloggers, etc. Hmm, cliche huh? And being a part of the guys is great, I'm always happy whenever they're around. I may be the wallflower in any other place, but I'm the flower in the group. :)